Pathetic humans!
Do you understand what you’ve DONE? My only method of fueling my glorious reign — PayPal has been struck down by Steam’s mysterious “processing issues,” leaving me stranded like Megatron after a budget cut!

How is a Warlord of Cybertron expected to operate under these barbaric conditions?
How am I supposed to purchase cosmetic nonsense I don’t need but MUST HAVE?

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And so, in these dark times, I issue a proclamation:

BRING TRIBUTE TO STARSCREAM!

Yes, you heard me!
Let the peasants gather digital offerings!
Let the weak tremble as I, Starscream, DEMAND support in my hour of inconvenience!

Do I expect you to comply?
Of course not you’re all far too poor and cowardly.

Do I demand it anyway?
ABSOLUTELY.

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Relax, moderators this is a joke.
If anyone actually tried giving me something, I’d assume they were concussed.

But until PayPal returns, know this:

A GREAT INJUSTICE HAS BEEN DONE TO ME — AND YOU WILL ALL HEAR ABOUT IT.